Big Boy

Dear Boston,

I've been waiting to write this letter for about a week, but we've been caught up in the craziness of moving. I finally found a moment while Daddy's touching up paint that I can sit down and write to you real quick.

About a week ago Daddy and I put you to bed as usual and you slept in your big boy underwear as usual.  In the middle of the night Daddy and I awoke to little footsteps passing us by.  Normally when you wake up in the night you come to our bed and tell one of us that you have to go potty, or you just climb in our bed to cuddle and fall back asleep.  But not tonight.

Daddy and I peaked our eyes open to watch you pass us by and head straight for our bathroom.  You went potty, flushed, put your Thomas the Train (or perhaps Lightening McQueen) underwear back on and pitter pattered right past us again and back to your room like it was no big deal.  Like you do this all the time.  As if it wasn't one of those stop us in our tracks (even at 2 am) parenting moments that deserves some acknowledgement! But there was no clapping, no cheering.  You didn't even stop to look back to see if we were watching, you just walked on by leaving Daddy and I to turn to each other and at the same time say, "Big boy!"  in somewhat sad voices.

Watching you grow up is adorable and exciting and heartbreaking all at the same time.  Some of the time you're so aware of how big you're getting and you swell up with pride in all your big boy glory.  But most of the time you don't see how much your changing and growing and turning into this amazing little person, but I do.  I'm so acutely aware of it and I gotta tell you kid, you're breaking my heart a little.
 Slow down.  Be little always.  At the very least don't stop saying, "I need Momma".  I already had to give up "Poons for spoons", that's where I draw the line.

These Little Men

Dear Boys,

I wrote this post about the two of you.  

Love, Momma

These little men of mine are growing up too fast.  Sometimes I wish I could capture them forever, just as they are right now.

My boys and their beautiful big blue eyes.  Their sweet smiles that make me laugh.  Their masses of light and dark hair mixed, with cowlicks in all the same places as Daddy.  My boys have big paws.  I rocked them both as we wound down for naps and I smiled noticing their long fingers and giant feet flopped over one another.  Those big hands and feet are a constant reminder that my Littles won’t be little for long.

These boys are equal parts silly and sweet, with a giant dollop of wild mixed in.  They love to dance. Isaac feels the rhythm of the music from his head down to his toes.  He tosses his head from side to side, while wildly stomping one foot.  Boston tries to keep up with my dance moves and laughs the whole way through.

I love these boys fiercely and they love me back.  I walk into a room and Isaac’s whole day has been made.  He crawls over to me as fast as his chubby limbs will let him, all the while laughing/crying.  It’s pretty great to be greeted with tears of joy…this doesn’t happen in most rooms I walk into.  Isaac knows how to make his girl swoon.  He would be happy if he could have one paw on me at all times.  Isaac loves to bundle up in my arms and rest his head on my shoulder

Boston loves me intensely.  He gives the biggest kisses and the fiercest hugs and before you know it he’s off!  You’ve gotta take these loves when you can get them with Boston, because he’s always in a hurry.  However there are those moments that he needs a good long hug, like when he’s hurt, or his feelings are hurt, or when he just wakes up, or is ready to go down.  In these moments he may even offer you a few pat pats, or rubs on the arm.  He’s not selfish.   Overall Boston is a Daddy’s boy, but when he wakes up from a nightmare, he always calls out for Momma.

My little boys love each other and light up when the other wakes from a nap.  They’re a little team these two.  Sometimes I can’t wait to see what charming little men they turn out to be, but you won’t see me wishing away these days where they are mine and I am theirs and that’s all that matters.

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Planes, Trains and Automobiles

Dear Boston,

I recounted a special day we had just yesterday on my blog, and I want you to have it in your letters.  
Here it is,

  I watched out the car window as Dane took pictures of Boston in front of the old Pasco train.  I could see Boston pointing out different features on the train and smiling as he ran around it.  They hopped back in the car and as we were about to turn onto the freeway we saw a real train cruising by.  

We chased it.

Driving fast, with Boston’s window rolled down we passed the train up.

Dane don’t go too fast, Boss is loving this. 

We’re gonna pass it up so we can pull over and watch it drive by.

We left the train behind us and pulled onto the dirt road next to the tracks.  Dane and I raced out of the car trying to get Boston out as fast as possible, so he could see the train up close.  We both rushed to Boston’s door (I got there first).  I unbuckled him quickly as Boston laughed shouting,

Hurry Momma! Train!

I yanked Boston out of the car seat and handed him to Dane just in time.  The conductor (noticing two crazy parents and one excited toddler) Looked out his window and gave us a big wave and train whistle.  I’ve never seen Such a thrilled look of awe on this little boys face.  Dane and I wanted to kiss the conductor for waving to Boston. 

Sir Topham Hat Mom! 

I know baby!  

All three of us stood there laughing and cheering.  Dane and I were just as excited as Boston.  When we got back in the car Boston recounted the experience in disbelief,

Holy Cow! I waved at train!  Hiiiii Train!!

On a high from this little adventure we decided to drive by the airport to catch a few planes flying by.  Boston watched the planes go up and down the runway hoping he might see a crash (we didn’t thank goodness) and cheering as the planes took off.  As we left the airport we saw a police car and decided to follow him just to really round out this day of awesomeness.  As we followed  this officer, someone began to speed so the police car’s lights went on and we were wrapped up in another adventure.  It was thrilling (for us, not the poor person getting pulled over).  

Boston hasn’t stopped talking about our adventures earlier today.  What would of been a very normal afternoon turned into a two year old boys dreams. Parenting isn’t always crazy exciting when you’re caught up in the every day business of life, but today we spent an hour adventuring with our two year old son and we might as well of been in Disney land. Down the road Boston might forget this day, but it’s going down as a favorite for Dane and I.  

I love you Boston. I hope we always go  adventuring together.        Love, Momma   

Isaac: 8 months

A little Zekey update is in order.

Dear Isaac,

You are 9 months old in 3 days and you've been officially crawling now for about 2 weeks. This last week you started climbing up on your high knees and are now pulling yourself up on furniture and standing up.

You weigh about 22 lbs and still have the best thighs.  Your still as sweet as can be.  A very mellow, easy to please babe.  You sleep (mostly) through the night.  About 5 every morning you wake up to nurse and then go back to sleep for a few hours.  What a napper you are!  You will take a nap whenever you can get one.  We aim for 2 naps a day, but sometimes it's 1 nap with lots of little cat naps while we're out and about.  The other day you took two 3 hour long naps.  Tired boy!  But every day I try and get you and Boss down at 2 and you both will sleep till 5 and sometimes you till 6!  

You have 3 words in your miniature vocabulary right now.  They are (in order) 

Dadda

Nunna/Nanna

Momma

It took awhile to get to the Momma part, but we got there.  You're a great little eater and nurser and no allergies yet, woohoo!  Ever since you got tubes at about 7 1/2- 8 months, you haven't had an ear infection and are sleeping so much better.  

You and Boston are becoming such good buds.  You make each other laugh and Boston so looks forward to every opportunity to play with you.  

Time to bring out the gates, you'll be walking in no time...ey yi yi. 

I love you. Love,

Momma

25 Words

Dear boys,

Inspired by a talk in Conference today, I contemplated what I would have you both know, If I could only say it in 25 words.  This is what I would tell you both,

I love you with all my heart.
God loves you with all his heart.
Love God with all your heart.
This will bring you joy.

Love,

Momma

Boston's latest and greatest

Dear Boston,

You make me laugh all the time these days.  Here are some of my favorite moments I've observed.

Yesterday at the grocery store you were shouting hello at everyone, per usual, and this was your conversation with one lady.

You:  Hello!
Lady: Oh, hi!
(She continues to walk down the isle)
You:  Ok.  Bye!  See you later!  Peace out!

Later on that same shopping trip we saw a cute, sparkly five year old girl in the check out line.  You were helping me load our groceries onto the belt.

You: Hi!
Little Girl: Hi!
You: I helping Mommy and Zekeyboo
(Little girl just stares at you)
You: Cool shoes! (she had sparkly light up shoes)
Little girl: They light up!  (She begins to tap her feet)
You: Cool.

Looks like you're already figuring out the way to a girls heart...when all else fails, compliment the shoes.

We were just saying morning prayer and this was your final line,
"Bless food to nourish, strengthen, bodies, choo choo train, amen".  Not quite sure how Jesus Christ got replaced with choo choo train, but it seems reasonable for a 2 year old.

Lately you pretend you're on the phone and you say,
"Hello, choo choo train, bye".

You're very polite lately and if I stub my toe, or get hurt in anyway, even if you didn't do it, you say,

"Ohhh, sorry Mommy".  I love it.

You're adorable.  I'm really liking this 2 1/2 year old thing.  I love you.

Love,
Momma

I miss you already

Dear Isaac,

I'm experiencing some growing pains tonight. My time with you as my baby is going by too quickly.  I remember when we brought you home from the hospital Daddy set up a co-sleeper on my side of the bed.  That first night home I laid you in it, and you slept there...for about 5 minutes.  That 6 inches between us was  too much space, so I cozied you right up to me and that's where you stayed for the first 6 weeks of your life.  I decided baby steps were needed for us to get a little better sleep, so I started laying you down in the co sleeper.  You slept ok, but during our night time feedings, I would scoop you up, lay you at my side and we both slept better.  With your little head laid against my chest, the two of us would fall asleep in that same position for hours. When I eventually woke up, I would lay you back in bed, until our next feeding.

About a month ago,  I started putting you in your car seat in our walk-in-closet to sleep.  You like it in that cozy car seat.  In fact you can't fall into a deep sleep in my arms anymore.  You're growing up.  Tonight Daddy and I decided it was time.  We bundled up the co sleeper, opened up space in the closet and officially made it your new bedroom.  I'm lying in bed right now feeling lonely.  You're officially moved out.  You might as well be 18 and living on your own.  I keep a photo of you on my nightstand that's replaced the baby bed.  It was taken a few days after I brought you home.  My hairs disheveled, my shirt twisted up, I'm holding you and Boston close to me. I look so happy, and I was.

I have loved being the Mom to baby Isaac, and I'm having a hard time letting that baby move on. I'm already missing the times that have yet to pass us by.  How silly is that?  It's like  when a friend comes to visit and you miss them before they've even left.

Don't worry though, I have a little experience in this whole "growing up" department.  I won't hold you back, I'll let you grow.  Let you evolve...let you become. And I'll be ok.  I thought I would never stop missing your brother as my baby, but that ache's been replaced with longings for my toddler Boston. So I guess we should all just accept the reality of our situation, (the one in which my delicate heart is held in the small hands of my two little boys ),  I'll love you both to pieces and miss you every step of the way.

Sweet dreams tonight.

Love,
Momma